h0odrich:

not interested dot com forward slash you

timtampon:

timtampon:

I was talking to my friend on the phone and then she almost got run over and i was obviously really concerned so i asked her if she was okay and after a moment she replied “there is a Jesus in the sky” in a really matter-of-fact sort of way
so obviously I thought something was seriously wrong butimage

omg please don’t bring this back
People are converting because of this post and I’m actually Jewish oh god I fucked up

lennon-in-the-sky-with-timelords:

So my cousin was in a gay pride parade and everything in her outfit and makeup was rainbow but she was wearing red contacts and while marching, a protester behind her yelled “You’re going straight to hell” and she turns around to face him with her fuCKING blood red eyes and she says “well duh, I got a kindom to run” and the protester nearly fucking passed out that is her legacy I want to be like her

nnilkshake:

why test on animals when there r people who r rude to waiters

boypillow:

annoyingbloqqer:

life hack: kill everyone except ur crush so they’re forced to date u

image

aschoolgirlcrush:

“will u marry me?”

“okie dokie”